LA vs. NYC - Can't We All Just Get Along?

The burning question, Los Angeles vs. New York City.. Which is better? Which is cooler?

As a certified New Yorker who lived in LA both before and after NYC, people often ask me if I like LA or NYC more. And my response is always the same, "Both cities are amazing, it just depends what you're looking for." 

If your priority is to be surrounded by culture, professional growth, overt intellectual stimulation, style and urban living -- you likely will not be happy in LA. If you're looking for sunshine, laid back people, space, healthy living, outdoor adventures and physical challenges -- you likely will not be happy in NYC. 

It's easy for me to answer this question because I've felt both. Toward the end of living in LA from '02-'05 I felt the former; and when I left NYC and moved back to LA eight years later I felt the latter.

I've seen numerous articles about people who prefer LA and attack NYC and vice versa. I don't understand why there can't just be a preference and stop there. Is it necessary to point out how NYC has horrible weather, nasty people, and long work hours? And that LA people seem fake and it's a real drag having to drive everywhere? 

To me, the "bad" is also what creates the charm: freezing winters can be cozy and scorching hot summers can be sexy, the no bullshit attitude makes for impeccable loyalty and friendships, and the people work hard because they are driven to achieve their goals. And on the flip side, it's actually pleasant to get smiled at when running daytime errands, and driving to work with my sunroof open while listening to NPR and sipping coffee from my cup holder is pretty sweet too. 

Both cities are beautiful. Just because they are among the top U.S. big cities to reside in doesn't mean we are inclined to choose one over the other, love one and hate the other. LA and NYC shouldn't be compared at all in my opinion. Rather, they should both be embraced for the very different awe-inspiring experiences each has to offer. I can't imagine one without the other. 


Sincerely,
Sahra

Costa Rica

I've never cried when a trip is over. I have, of course, cried when saying goodbye to loved ones at the airport, and have felt depressed when boarding that dreadful flight from Miami back to New York in early January (we've been having holiday family reunions in South Beach since 2007). But never a cry/borderline sob because I am just so... sad. Even Paris didn't do that to me. Paris was incredible, especially because it was our first trip to Europe together, but I was okay with heading home when it was time to go. Not Cost Rica though. Costa Rica is the closest experience I've had to paradise.

Waking up at six every morning slightly anxious thinking about the new adventure that awaited us, discussing the proper attire and how to pack our bags for that day. Should I wear my suit under my hiking clothes for when we swim the waterfalls? Is carrying a banana in my backpack a bad idea? Do you think we should pack towels for when we reach the lagoon in the crater of the volcano? Do you want surf lessons today or should we just rent boards? Should I take off my jewelry for the hot springs? Are my rain boots appropriate for zip lining? Do we want to go straight to the beach after we ride horses through the rainforest? 

These questions alone are a gorgeous start to any day.

Then we would proceed to breakfast stopping for iguanas crossing the sidewalk and to watch the most vibrantly colored butterflies flutter past us. And there was that one morning we walked out our front door greeted by two white faced monkeys no more than eight feet in front of us. They were tugging aggressively at the rooftop, and stopped to make eye contact with us. Joshua screamed Ruuun! and we went down the back stairs. I didn't understand their intention messing with the roofing of our hotel (since they are smart animals after all), but Joshua explained to me that this is where the term "monkeying around" comes from; there is no reasoning, they are just causing trouble. Like teenage boys, he says.

One of our tour guides told us later that the locals refer to the white faced monkeys as "the mafia." Ha.

Galavanting through the rainforest and being dominated by mother nature's territory is living on a whole new level. I went to Costa Rica ready to fight off all the creepy crawlers, but after our first day I was oohing and aahing at how cute they are. Even the lizard we found slithering through my toiletries, and the baby one we found in our bed.. Pura Vida!*

The waterfalls and streams were fresh and just cool enough. The ocean had no frightening sea creatures, great waves, and felt like bath water. And whether on a hike, swimming, or walking home from dinner -- we were always happy when it rained.

Heaven.

And for my friends that plan a trip to Costa Rica and are curious what we did:

Arenal Volcano, La Fortuna
Spent three nights here, stayed at Tabacon Hot Springs Resort (highly recommend it)
Day 1
Boat ride down Rio Frio.
Day 2
Hike Cerro Chato, a neighboring volcano. Very challenging hike. I was sore the rest of the week :) Make sure you swim in the crater when you make it to the top. This was Joshua's favorite part of the entire trip.
Visit and swim the La Fortuna waterfall.
Day 3
Hike Arenal rainforest with hanging bridges.
Zip-line.
Day 4
Fly to Quepos.

Manuel Antonio
Spent four nights here, stayed at Parador Resort and Spa (highly recommend it)
Day 5
Walk through rainforest to get to hotel's private beach (got surrounded by white faced monkeys on our way down). Snorkeled here.
Surf lessons (for me) at Manuel Antonio beach.
Day 6
Rainforest hike in Manuel Antonio National Park.
Surf Manuel Antonio Beach.
Ronnie's to watch sunset (BEST grouper fish here).
Day 7
Horseback ride to the waterfalls.
Back to Manuel Antonio Beach.
Day 8
Back to San Jose for a night. Leave next morning for home.


Sincerely,
Sahra


*A motto used in the Costa Rican dialect. People use it as a greeting, and in many other contexts. The literal translation is "Pure Life," but the true meaning is much more profound. It is a way of life, a reminder to enjoy our short time here. That no matter what your current situation, there is someone else who is in a less fortunate one. The Ticos are among the kindest people I have ever met.

Rosewater (no spoilers here)

Film written and directed by Jon Stewart.

My thoughts:

- Flattered that Stewart's directorial debut was a movie about Iran.

- His intended audience is definitely Americans. All the characters speak English the entire movie, even the taxi driver and prison guard in Iran. There are few subtitles.

- Very tastefully done. He chose not to get graphic with the rioting scenes in Iran or the beatings in prison. I applaud him for this. His goal was not to cheaply captivate people with gory scenes, like most Hollywood movies. His intention is smarter than that, and he assumes a more intelligent audience.

- There are a handful of one-liners that have Stewart's wit written all over them. So good.

All things considered: B+

Jon Stewart is the man.

Sincerely,

Sahra

Get It Together, Uber

I love Uber. It's pure genius and I often get irritated that I didn't think of it myself.

But here is my complaint: They do not know where they are going. EVER.

Maybe I'm spoiled after spending almost a decade in NYC, but I'm used to jumping in a cab, telling the driver the cross streets, and spending the rest of the ride talking to my friend, looking out the window, catching up on emails, or calling my mom. In other words, I am completely checked out and get to spend those 15 minutes however I like. I trust my cabbie, and nine out of ten times he knows exactly where he's going.

Then there's Uber. Even though the cars are fancy, they offer you bottled water, and they sometimes even hold the door open for you... they are clueless with directions. Here is my standard Uber experience:

- 'Set Pickup Location' on my phone
- Text is sent informing me Uber is on it's way
- Another text informing me Uber has arrived
- We head out the front door
- No Uber
- A few minutes later, I get a phone call asking for my exact address (isn't that the point of the app?)
- I give it to him and he says "OK will be there momentarily"
- We wait
- No Uber
- He calls again and now asks for the cross streets
- I give him cross streets and he says "OK will be there momentarily"
- We wait
- No Uber
- He calls again. But this time he tell me what streets he is on and asks how to get to my pickup location
- I end up sitting on the phone with him and giving him step by step directions on how to get to my location, until he drives right up in front of me and I wave at him to pull over while I'm still on the phone with him. He's arrived!
- Uber driver jumps out of the car, opens the door for us, and apologizes profusely (always very friendly those Uber drivers)
- "Where to?" He asks
- "Sunset, corner of Stanley"
- He starts driving south on San Vicente towards Wilshire (complete opposite direction)
- I say "Woah woahhh do you know where Sunset is? Get to Sunset and head east."
- He pulls over and says "Sorry, please give me the address"
- (OMG) "1510 N Stanley Avenue"
- He punches it into this GPS (PUNCHES IT INTO HIS GPS!?)
- Since we all know that GPS can often take you in a roundabout way, I end up guiding him street by street on how to get where I want to go.

Needless to say, I didn't get to enjoy the company of my fellow Uber riders as I had to pay close attention so he wouldn't miss any streets. Which they do if you don't hold their hands the entire ride.

Call me crazy, but shouldn't there be a test for drivers? A test of the main roads in the area you are assigned to navigate? Doesn't that seem fair? Approriate? A requirement as a driver??

And what's worse is that when I tell the driver to head east, for instance, he doesn't even know which way is east. How is that possible? Even if you are not required to take a test, as a driver wouldn't you take it upon yourself to familiarize yourself with a map so you have the slightest clue of the main roads and which direction is what? Glance at the GPS every now and then so you have an idea of east, of west, north, south. At the very least! What happened to taking pride in your work and having the personal desire to be the very best at what you do. Take the little time it takes to learn. Learn. Use your brain. Challenge yourself. 

There are too many shortcuts nowadays and it has made people lazy. Your brain is a muscle, folks. Just like your abdominal muscles, if you stop using them you lose strength. The internet has spoiled people and many do not want to use their brains anymore because they do not have to. It's disappointing and discouraging.

Uber COO: please make a road test part of the driving requirements so your drivers are as smart as your company.

Uber Drivers: if it's not a requirement, please do your homework and try to use your brain power while you drive. It's good exercise for that muscle, and makes for a much better experience for your customers that you are so eager to please.


Me, personally? I would choose a ride in an OK car with a smart driver, than a fancy ride with a clueless driver any day.


Sincerely,
Sahra

How To Be The Best Concert Buddy

1. BUDDY
Always take someone who:
a) Knows the band
b) Doesn't know the band but you're certain they will be able to appreciate them, or
c) Is a good time no matter what.

If they do not fit one of the above, do not take them. Inviting the wrong person to a show can ruin a potentially unforgettable evening.

2. ALCOHOL
One drink is recommended before you get to the venue. This will loosen you up and get you excited from the moment you walk into the show. Do not drink too much before a show. This is a rookie mistake. You have the entire rest of the night to get drinks and if you start off too buzzed, you will become that annoying drunk person that is bumping into people while dancing. And if you are a true music fan, you do not want to drink too much because you will not remember the show.

Once you get to the show, I highly recommend beer as the drink of choice because:
- It's light
- It won't stain anything if it spills on yourself or someone else
- You can safely sip on it all night
- You will feel fine the next day and be able to enjoy that post-concert high without a headache.

This does not work with mixed drinks, folks. Your drink will finish quicker than you expected which means more trips to the bar, the liquor will sneak up on you and you will be wasted when the show is already over, and you will wake up with a wretched hangover and high bar tab.

3. LOCATION
If you are anything like me, you somehow always end up front stage center. When I see a band I love, the music physically draws me to the front. I can't sit back and watch from the back of the venue... I want to see the musicians sweat. That's why I want to see them live! So here's how:

Pockets
Do not ever push to the front or block people's view. That's rude. There are other fans there that are just as excited and you are no more entitled. When a song ends, the lights are down, and everyone is cheering, that's when you will see what I like to call "pockets."A pocket is when there is a small opening that usually one or two people can seamlessly scoot in without touching or interrupting your neighboring fans. Head bop or calmly dance your way into the pocket. If you continue to do this throughout the show, you will slowly end up where you want to be.

Height
When choosing your pockets, be aware of the height of the person you are popping in front of. I don't really have an issue with this as I'm 5'6, but I've been on the other side and it's really annoying when someone's noggin is suddenly in your line of vision. I don't think this is a deal breaker, but do be aware. Maybe when someone is on the shorter side, make sure it's a more spacious pocket so you don't stand directly in front of them. Leave some space so they can still see too.

May I also add that this is one of the reasons I am fond of my Love's height. He isn't too tall so he can navigate through crowds with me without bothering anyone. I've dated a few tall guys and that can get tricky...

Dance politely 
When you and your concert buddy just moved in, you can't throw your arms around and be too physical from the start. That's annoying and obnoxious. You are the new girl now and it will take a minute for people to be happy to have you there. Show respect and gain tenure.

Show that you're a real fan
On the flip side, you should definitely dance once the space has welcomed you. A really fun neighbor just moved next door and they'll be happy to have you!

Be nice to your neighbors
When you finally find a spot that you would like to call home, make nice with your neighboring fans. Dance with them a little during a song. In between songs say hello, maybe do a cheers, or even a quick conversation about the band. Once at a Black Keys show (Madison Square Garden, 2012), this guy next to me and I did Black Keys trivia -- what year a song came out, what album it's from, guess what they are playing next, etc. It was so much fun!

Cell phones
The first thing I do with my phone when I get to a show is turn down the brightness. Turn it all the way down - you will still be able to see, trust me. This way, if you want to shoot a quick text or take video your phone won't be so bright as to pierce the eyes of your neighbors. Many people don't know this trick, but it makes a world of a difference. And speaking of video, please be aware of the appropriate time to do it. You cannot pull out your phone anytime and start taping.. if you pay attention you will know when it's the right time. Not when the people next to you are rocking out too hard and please, I mean PLEASE do not tape for too long. It's rude. I try to keep mine at thirty seconds, and at the most one minute.

Please note that with all of the above, you should always vibe people. You will know if it's someone that wants to have a conversation or wants you in their space. If you feel they aren't interested, stay there and keep to yourself or move on to the next pocket. For me, the people surrounding me at a show is very important so I would absolutely move on... or up :)

Enjoy your next show!

Sincerely,
Sahra


P.S. Photo was taken by yours truly at the Merriweather Post Pavilion in 2012. Made it to the front row, baby!

Who Am I?

If my parents are both from Iran, I was born and raised in Ohio, went to college on the West Coast, spent my mid-20s and early-30s in New York City, and have now chosen to move back to Los Angeles -- which location best defines who I am?

My Persian household;
My Midwestern upbringing;
My professional and intellectual growth and independence in NYC;
My free-spirited, adventurous, smiley self that has now chosen LA.

They all encompass who I am today, of course, but which one best defines me? What time period is most influential and representative of me?

Sincerely,
Sahra

Our Hike

My fiancé and I took a trip to Big Bear over the weekend. It was a lovely trip -- we stayed in a cozy log cabin, cooked all of our meals, went on a beautiful hike, and it was both of our first times mountain biking. 

During our Saturday hike, I realized early on that Joshua and I weren't always aligned on which path to take up the mountain. (There was no set trail, it was paths we were choosing and creating along the way.) He would think one way was the "better" option and would motion for me to follow him, and I would feel an other direction was the best route and wanted him to follow me. 

You see, Joshua and I are both leaders. We've separately played this role with our friends and family since we were young, and are also good at it. It's an honor to be blessed with this talent, and I believe it should be embraced and cherished as it is an empowering quality rooted in personal confidence and trust from others. It's one of the sexiest qualities in Joshua, and what drew me to him when we first met at eighteen years old.

When I realized we had conflicting views of which direction was the smartest (and most fun) option to get us to the top of the mountain, I didn't argue with him or try to convince him that my idea was better. I just said to him, "OK if you think that's better, you go that way and I'll go this way."

This was the style we hiked for the rest of that afternoon. We would be one behind the other and when his gut was pulling him left and mine right, we would separate again...often losing each other for longer than anticipated. But we would always end up crossing paths again. 

To me, this was a beautiful and accurate representation of us as a couple, and as partners through life. One of the most precious things about marriage is agreeing to spend the rest of your life with someone. But this does not mean you have to walk identical paths, that there is an obligation to convince your spouse to always walk the same path as you. You are two distinct individuals and neither should feel their perspective or desires are less valuable than the other's because they are not the same.

The rest of our lives together is a long time (we hope) and both of us will evolve as humans. Personal growth is a sign that you are living, receiving, feeling, reflecting, learning, accepting, and growing. This is healthy. And in experiencing this, it is our responsibility as a lifelong partner to honor their journey. Put all judgements aside, support their goals, encourage them to follow their hearts, and welcome their improved selves with open arms.

And if our hike that afternoon is a true metaphor of our future together, walking separate paths from time to time will certainly bring lots of laughter and storytelling to the relationship too. 


Sincerely,
Sahra

Lemon-Thyme Chicken

Hello! 

Another recipe I made last night and it turned out phenomenal! My boyfriend's mom introduced me to this website and I believe all the recipes are this simple, quick, healthy, and delicious. Here it is, with some of my personal twist:

- 2 pounds chicken cutlets 
- Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper
- Flour for dredging (whole wheat pastry flour is what I used) 
- Unrefined, cold-pressed extra-virgin olive oil
- 1 large onion, halved and sliced thinly 
- 4 cloves garlic, sliced thinly
- 1/2 cup of fresh lemon juice
- 1 cup chicken stock
- A few sprigs of fresh thyme

Step 1:

Season the chicken cutlets on both sides with sea salt and black pepper. Dredge them with flour and shake off the excess.

Step 2:

Warm about ¼ cup olive oil over medium heat in a large skillet. Add the chicken cutlets and sauté on both sides until golden brown. Transfer the chicken to a plate.

Step 3:

Add the onions and garlic to the skillet and season with sea salt and pepper.  Sauté until tender, about 8 minutes.  Pour the lemon juice into the pan and scrape any brown bits on the bottom.  Add the chicken stock and thyme sprigs and bring to a simmer.  Transfer the chicken back to the pan with any accumulated juices.  Simmer until cooked through, about 5 minutes.

Step 4:

Remove thyme sprigs and serve immediately. 

Serve with (my twist):

- Rice, made in a Persian-style rice cooker

- Plain yogurt

- Raw radishes

That's it! Enjoy!

Sincerely,
Sahra

http://pamelasalzman.com/lemon-thyme-chicken/

Tasty Turkey Kabobs

I started cooking, everybody! I've finally started cooking on the regular and I love it.

I've been asking my mom for her recipes for years and she always says it's difficult for her to tell me over the phone because she doesn't use measurements (we've lived in different cities since I was 18 years old... I know, it's devastating). 

But now that I've been playing my own version of catch-up by looking up recipes, getting creative in the kitchen (and making plenty of mistakes), I have a better idea of ratios when I'm preparing a dish. (Ratios are key, friends). This, in turn, has helped me comfortably take direction from mom sans specific measurements. 

That said, I did exactly this and my mom's Persian-inspired turkey kabobs turned out perfect! Here is the direction I was given, including my own personal tweaks:

- 1 pound ground turkey 
- 2 medium-sized white onions, finely chopped
- Tumeric
- Salt
- Pepper
- 1/2 cup of dried parsley
- 3 garlic cloves
- Worcester sauce
- Olive oil
- One Egg

- Two tomatoes
- Lemon pepper
- Rice
- Plain yogurt
- Raw onions
- Cilantro
- Sumac (pronounced Somagh: http://www.kalamala.com/products/sumac-ground-4-oz)

Step 1:
Set oven on Bake, 500 degrees

Step 2:
Mix the first ten ingredients in a big bowl (wear gloves and massage well with your hands)
Add as much olive oil necessary to keep the mixture moist

Step 3:
Put foil on a cooking tray and spray with non-stick oil 

Step 4:
Make little patties (whatever shape and size you prefer) and lay them on the tray

Step 5:
Place in oven once heated to 500 degrees

Step 6:
Let bake for about 6-8 minutes (check on it and you will know when it's cooked)

Step 7:
Flip the patties, and add two whole tomatoes on the side of the cooking tray. Shake some lemon pepper and some olive oil on the tomatoes. Let cook again for 6-8 minutes.

Serve with:
- Rice. I make the rice with a Persian-style rice cooker (very easy).
- Plain yogurt
- Raw onions
- Cilantro
- And, of course, the warm tomatoes you just made with the kabob
- Sprinkle sumac on the rice, kabob, and tomatoes.


That's it! And it's pretty darn healthy too. Good luck!


Sincerely,
Sahra

Stop! Grammar Time

You welcome vs. You're welcome

Folks,

It is not "You welcome" as people too often say. It's "You're welcome." As in short for "You are welcome."

It's shocking how often this mistake is made, even on television. Let's stop the trend please. You will thank me later.

You're welcome.


Sincerely,
Sahra

Perspective

OG Blog Post #3

Before my surgery, my perspective was like this:

- My job isn’t satisfying every passion. I always felt I had so much to offer this world, and here I am, a 30-something with an OK job. How unoriginal.

- I’m unsure about this guy I’m dating.  He’s not a bad guy, but my gut keeps telling me to cut him loose. Ugh, am I wasting my time?

- All I want in life is a big kitchen, a garden, a bathtub I can actually lay down in, a backyard, and a mini-golden doodle. And here I am, living in a shoebox where I can’t do or own any of these.

Newfound perspective:

- I have an income that allows me the lifestyle I desire. I work from 9-6 and never on weekends. I can work out during my lunch break. I get along fabulously with my boss. I get one-month vacation each year.

So let’s get this straight. With my current job: I am not overworked, I am permitted the time to have my own life and pursue hobbies, I can enjoy the city any evening of the week and all weekend, I have the luxury to stay fit without waking up early or spending my precious evenings at the gym, I have plenty of time for dating, I can afford quality clothes, I can now incorporate cooking into my life on a regular basis as I have wanted to for years, I can travel the world without feeling rushed, AND most importantly, I have time to explore other career options.  Wait a minute… my job is AWESOME.  And it’s actually perfect for where I am in my life right now.

- I listened to my gut and cut that dud loose! Holy cow I’m so much happier now.

That is not a type-o, it’s supposed to say “dud.” I tried, it wasn’t working, I learned from it, now time to move on. And how lucky am I to even have that option for myself?  To live during a time when woman are allowed choices? What a blessing that I am financially independent, have my own place, and possess the strength, confidence, and support to not stay in a relationship out of fear of being alone or the need to be taken care of by a man. Boy, I am one lucky girl! I know He is out there and I can’t wait for the day we find each other.

-  NYC doesn’t have to be your last home or last city you live in. So start planning your escape plan to a more affordable city that will allow you the luxury of space and a backyard, and in the meantime, enjoy possibly your last several months in the greatest city on earth!

You are here by choice. It made sense seven years ago, but now you are in a new phase in your life and are prioritizing different things. This is normal. It’s called evolving as a human being. Appreciate how NYC has taught you to be a minimalist, be thankful you are at least living alone, and don’t forget that you can leave whenever you feel ready.

See how quickly your entire state of mind can change, just by keeping proper perspective? It’s almost like magic! Viewing my life through one mirror and then another.

Sincerely,

Sahra